The sentiment is universal. Looking outside to see what’s missing inside – we’ve all done that. This piece does need some grammatical assistance. The fourth sentence, in particular.

Thanks. Truthfully, grammar is one of the technical writing skills I’ve always had the most trouble with.

Reminds me of ‘The Cave’…not the song by Mumford and Sons, but the old school philosophical idea of how we perceive the world. The first line feels very redundant, with it being dark, muddled, beyond, and hidden. Definitely got the sentiment, though it felt muddled in places, like that first line, and a few other spots.

Yeah, I more or less did this one on a constant stream of consciousness. How I do most of my poems actually. I try to go over them afterwards for spelling errors, but grammatical errors are something I’ve always had trouble with.