The Indecisive Villain

In the Pit of Oblivion, the Chancellor said to the Underlord: “The Gray Invocation of the Spirit of Annihilation is all but ready. We only need gather some dragon bones, and…”

“No, no, wait,” said the Underlord. “I have a better idea. Why don’t we wear Legend Arcane down by sending all his enemies against him at once?”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous. Every single villain tries that and it never works. And this is the third time this week alone you’ve changed plans. If you’d conquered as many worlds as you’ve made up plans, we’d have won already!”

“But I’ve already outlined it. See?” He rummaged around in his notebook of evil plans (bound in human skin) and showed the Chancellor a flowchart.

“Enough with these God-blessed flowcharts! Do you seriously think the universe will tremble before someone who uses flowcharts?”

“I don’t see why not. Hey, I’ve got an idea. Why don’t we capture the sun and hold it for ransom?”

“For Satan’s sake, just pick a plan and stick with it. The universe isn’t conquering itself.”

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