Why is it always me?, I think, reflecting on my earlier escapades. I always have had…strange luck, but this was just ridiculous. Certainly God must have a sadistic sense of humor concerning my general welfare. Just the other day when I was protecting my ward, I not only managed to escape a pit of voles, I also saved said ward from a most horrid fate of being eaten by a rabbit. A rabbit, I tell you. I honestly get no respect. At least the pay’s good, not like my last job, which was quite disastrous. Still, I persevere and suffer, making sure the stupid boy doesn’t die anytime soon on my watch. Let’s just hope and pray that tomorrow he won’t be buying the farm.