Classis grade a+. Wildly entertaining. Could c the entire scene in my mind. Bravo. Cheers!

I deny being that challenger.

It’s not the size of the ficly that matters, but the author who rights it.

And edit, i do!

Very nice last line!

Yep, the last line really sealed it, nicely off-setting the serious/dramatic tone with which several of us seem to have addressed this entrance challenge. Nicely done to participate in the stated challenge while also providing a nice visual and bit of humor.

Hehe. Yay for short people!

There’s such an ease and flow to your writing that I admire. Excellently executed attire, to weapon, to flag, and even a little comic relief at the end. A strong entry, lady Elshanor :)

In case you were wondering, Elisabeth L Davis named me Elshanor because being keeper of the great library at Hawk Manor reminded her of the character Elinor in the Inkheart series. But for this challenge I wrote myself more like Katniss from the Hunger Games. The adventurous me.

The Lady Pandorica never fidgets! Nor does she mumble! She stands strong against the wind, no matter what you say!

Stupendous, as usual, my Lady. Need I say much else to the calibre of your penscript?

Raising her left forearm, a shriek rang out. … It’s weird. My brain says THIS IS NOT RIGHT. I feel like it should read As she rose her left forearm… or something like that.

I love the hawk. Hawks are brilliant birds, aren’t they. Gracefull yet deadly.

The last line got me.

I also love the Hawk and how you made sure not to startle her.

Of course, I am a huge fangirl/stalker :)

M’lady, I bow to thee – with both arms at my side – so as not to startle the hawk! []o)

You grace us with your presence as well as your penning. And, to be sure, I wasn’t the one who called you short. But I must admit, I did laugh at the writing of it.

As far as the razing of the shrieking arm is concerned: Perhaps the “shriek” should be heard first; then the arm raised, then the hawk lands?

all fabulous suggestions! The idea wasd that her raised arm was a signal,a call to the hawk, so I think I want the shriek to come second, as a clue that it responded. I doubt the hawk shrieks every time it sees the arm of it’s trainer, but it worked for me here.
As for the as, I think that works better to convey the action comes from elsewhere, not her arm. :)