I feel your pain. “Desperation overrides cowardice” is a great line and rings true. All of the science and medical terminology is well thought out. The last line is excellent. Sometimes it is that which makes us the most human that makes other people the most uncomfortable.

Thanks for your feedback, Robert. This isn’t based on any specific incident, it’s more like an amalgamation of several. I was trying to make it relatable for anyone who is familiar with the pain of rejection.

This is awesome.
we’ve all been there and done that.
I think this is clever pertaining to how people feel nervous about telling others how they feel and the way of technology. :) I liked reading this a lot.

To go from dense techno-babble to a very common human response was done with remarkable skill. You’ve made a fan out of me with this first work of yours that i read.

I like the techno-stuff, and this would have been a great entry in the ‘Nerdy Love Letter’ that was up just recently.

A few grammar type things, like I think the line, “Displaying love through cold machines,” might read better, “Love displayed through cold machines.” Both are fragments, but I think noun fragments sit a little better than verb ones, if that makes sense.

When I saw the title on the featured ficly, I knew I had to read it. I wasn’t disappointed. This is a great story and really speaks to those of us who spend a large portion of our lives staring at monitors.

A great piece. 5 pencils!