You’re missing an ‘of’ in the fourth paragraph – between ‘rest’ and ‘your’…

That was really very clever. I hadn’t even considered that it was a take on cinderellla. Maybe you could develop this and make Tumbleweed the fairy godmother? Could be epic!

If you intended the last line to be speech, I would put it in speech marks and maybe replace the italics with bold? If not then I’m confused.

I love the cute relationship between Cinderella and Tumbleweed. They both seem like really nice guys! Loved the image of the sneezing and giggling especially.

Oh! I just love this. I mean really. It’s like a heartwarming little tale. I’ll never hoover up a dust bunny again I swear. And the idea of them migrating via feather duster! I’m all warm and tingly.
Abby x

Dear Abby, Thanks for the fresh eyes, you are great proof reader! Thanks for the comments too.

Actually Abby, I like the idea of italicising speech when it is pertinent and simply a one-off quote. And it especially works here as it is coming from somewhere outside the scene.

And you’re not that confused, mate, as you understood it was speech.

A great piece 32 Squared. I’m quickly becoming a fan.

@scratch’n’scrawl – I meant that I would be confused if it wasn’t speech.

After reading, I imagine this as sort of a prequel to Cinderella…next, the Dust Bunnies start divulging the little secrets of the sisters to Cinderella and she sees them for who they really are.

Very cute take on Cinderella. It almost makes her sound mad, in a cute sort of way. Nice little bit of story.

I love everything about this piece. The characters, the dialog, the action, the reveal…I nodded and said to myself, “Of course, Cinderella would be that kind to a dust bunny.”

Very nice ending…didn’t expect that, nor the serious personification of dust bunnies. Well executed little idea, with lots of room to grow into just about anything!

All of you here at Ficly are amazing. You all created this little piece by giving me great advice and encouragement.

This story was actually written as a bedtime story for ME. I hadn’t slept for a couple days, so I sat down to write a bedtime story to myself. After making some minor edits, (Thanks ABBY !) I slept for an entire day and awoke to all these wonderful comments and enough pencils to last me a long time.

Ficly is an amazing community, this is as much your story as it is mine.

I’m not sure what a Dust Bunny is but I still understood. It was so adorable, and I got a Cinderella feel even before I knew it was her. Adorable <3

This story just plain rocked.it made me say on oh aloud and an audible chuckle. Bravo sir