This is fucking brilliant. I love it.

You’re too kind. :3

From the diction and imagery in your short stories, its evident you’re a talented writer, but I suggest toning down the angst in your pieces.

When I first started writing it’d take me ten drafts to tone the negativity in my poetry, but it gets easier as you keep at it. Looking forward to reading your stories!

I like the negativity! Another INTERESTING piece…if a little scary. How do you know what killing feels like so well? o.O

You need an apostrophe in ‘girls’ – ’girl’s’.

Damn! Now I’m scared of criticising you. Ah well, it had a really good flow, the speech felt very genuine. I would split the last line – not really changing any of your words, but for the flow of it -
“it’s a game,” he said, “and I always win.”

Brilliant! Keep writing =D
Abby x

Thank you insanity. I think the angst and negativity is a large part of my writing style, and I wouldn’t want to tone it down. Especially since the topics I’m writing about are dark. It wouldn’t be the same without the negative connotations and dark imagery.

Abby, thank you! I’ve never killed someone, no worries. ;)

Thanks, I’ll fix the “girl’s”.

How come it’s always the innocent-looking girls who have the darkest secrets? I friggin love this piece and hope you put more like this out.

No secrets here! Thank you, and expect that I will because, to be honest, it rings true of my writing style.