Visceral. Aside from a few grammar points such as commas and capitalization, this communicates quite intensely the experiential horror of the character. I might recommend marking this as mature simply because of its disturbing nature, but as it is merely emotionally raw and not truly gory, it’s really your choice.

@memento thanks! yes it is a little rough, but it is really hard to depict a tortorous scene! if there is anything else i can change about it do let me know! thanks :D