I’m confused. I looked for tags to help but there aren’t any.
As an actual story, it seems either way over my head or intentionally obtuse. I don’t really understand how the second act follows from the first act, and maybe that’s one of the problems; it seems like there are two distinct acts and in a story so short that’s tricky for the reader.
“Late in the night, as the party fell into that haze where most of the people are black out drunk, it all gets so misty and light. The little black man was now several inches above the ground.”
I’d try to remove one of the uses of ’black ’ here. Maybe go for a more abstract description of being drunk.
Spiderj