as shirley skid by doing an altogether ironically timed vulgar hip thrust she was noticed by noted producer mr carps. who followed her every move with his eyes but not taking his face out of the ample breasts sitting next to him in a red sequined gown. Shirley was now skidding towards the bandstand that was draped with ropes of fresh bananas in celebration of the banana harvest. as her tragic ending loomed seemingly inexorably in a hail of banana confusion she began to twist in a manner that chubby checker even wouldve been impressed by. due to the minor fluctuation in gravity she caused by twisting she caused the ropes of dangling bananas to wind up around her middle like a top spinning in reverse. by this time the band had realised the sheer production value involved and began playing an appropriately themed rhumba. as shirley continued skidding all the way across the dancefloor and up the stage ramp the crowd grew silent and perturbed.