(Pardon my spelling. It’s 3 a.m, and this box is too damn small)

What a great line: “my lips stuck where my face slumbered”.

I’m aware you’ve asked for constructive criticisms, so here goes….this line is wonderful, let it be the only line that speaks towards a certain element and use the rest of the space for other elements.

That one line, “my lips stuck where my face slumbered” is so vivid, it needs nothing more, nothing. The more you write on Filcy, you will write more and more sentences and descriptions like this one.

1774, yes? You could write about how the inebriated stranger you about why you’re sitting in the middle of his world on a giant fucking mushroom.

Oh, and you don’t overuse adjectives, that’s one thing many can’t master, or do without, like a woman who doesn’t know when to stop putting her makeup on; she’ll walk out into the streets looking like a clown, not a pretty picture I must say…Ya feelin me?

I mean’t “you don’t” as in “you didn’t”, a good thing.

TY ;)