12/7/11

existence makes me sick
deeply sick
like sick to the stomach
but deeper,
so much deeper.

so deep
that the sickness
penetrates
into another dimension
and into the darkest
banes of my
worthless existence
I’m a fan of
inverted introversion

I want to be a hermit
I want to crawl so deep inside of myself
that my skin reverses
and my guts spill out onto the floor

but I won’t be embarrassed
no, not this time
the final time
for me, at least
because by the time I am exposed
my soul will be gone
and I will create a tangent
into the other dimension
where the news is only good
and I hide my
smiles
behind frowns
because what if this isn’t how
life is meant to be?
what if life should be just the opposite
and God will wonder if
we
are real
and not just a figment
of His
imagination.