Dear Father.

Dear Father,

You ruined me.
And you don’t care.
I believed you that day,
when you said you were just going to the grocery store,
and that you’d be back soon.
Funny how I never saw you again.
You left, and you took an essential part of me with you.
Did you think I would be okay?
Did you even think of me at all?
I was 4, and you scarred me.
I never healed.
Where were you, Daddy?
The word feels foreign on my tongue.
You don’t deserve the term.
Where are you now?
It’s been hard, going through life without you.
Every day I wonder
why I was never good enough
to make you want to stay.
And if my own father wouldn’t even stay and love me,
what man ever would?
You ruined me.
But somehow, everyday,
out of the wreckage and the remains,
I grow a little bit stronger.
Every new day I survive,
the sadness in my eyes dissolves
a little bit more.
As hard as it can get,
I realize more each day
that I don’t need you,
and I never did.


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