not as polished as the first two. this one has a few spelling and grammatical errors, most obviously, it flips back and forth between tenses.

Well that was horrid. You do have an inexplicable shift from past to present then back to past tense. Otherwise, a chilling and horrific scene.

Wow. I don’t know how I missed that the first time, thanks for pointing it out. I fixed it and made it all one tense