Wow. This has beautiful imagery and I think need more explaination behind the crow in a sequel, unless I’m missing something. Well Done

There’s a bit of a surreal, quasi-existential sort of undertone here… which reminds me of Mercer’s tomb world, from PKD’s Do Androids?. I like it. The horror, and the dreamlike helplessness, are both quite striking.

My only complaints are tiny nitpickings: a bit of punctuation in the third paragraph’s second line of dialog which should be ""…yourself," he says as…"; and the bit about “resilient power” in the first paragraph, which strikes me as a strange way to phrase it; also, the bit about imploding seems a little off to me because ‘implode’ is very sudden kind of collapse, whereas ‘crumble’ implies a slower pace… I feel ‘crumble’ and similar, “slow” words might fit better than ‘implode’? Just a suggestion, though, so feel free to ignore it. These things are pretty minor, and don’t detract much from the story’s quality.

The last two sentences are not as strong as the rest of the story. “It’s he who has…” is constructed awkwardly, and “The crow is merging…”, doesn’t appear to be accurate, as the crow is Addison (which I think also confused Ghost). Of course, you may have an idea that isn’t fully realized here.

Thanks for all of the constructive critiques. I did change some grammar stuff… as for the story it’s a snippet from something already very much in progress. Sorry for the confusion and thanks again for the criticism.