There are days when I feel a very tenuous connection to life. As if it is the thinnest cord, a mere strand of spiderweb that ties me to this reality. If that thread were to suddenly snap, would I drop dead to the floor? Would the death be classified as natural causes? I wonder if that silver cord is the ‘strength of will’ that people talk about. I suppose it is the difference between two people who get into almost identical accidents, yet one lives and the other dies. Or when a person dies from non-life-threatening wounds. Yes, it’s all about the thickness of an invisible cord that swells when we have something to live for and thins when we don’t.

I always have weird thoughts when I am in a hospital.

Tapping on the glass, I stared at the unmoving form of my sister. She hadn’t moved for seven months and my visits had grown more sporadic. Were the machines all that was keeping her alive? Or was she fighting to live because she had something to live for? I was ashamed that I didn’t know. Why didn’t I know?