This is not the direction I expected it to take! Well done.

Agreed. Unexpected and jarring — but still delicious.

I love the oblivion ring and the fact that killing Jenny was so simple. The oblivion ring is something that really only works in prose – there’s no elegant way that a TV show or radio play could communicate it.

I wonder if you’re telling rather than showing a bit in the first paragraph – I think ‘Self-disgust rose with bile in her throat’ takes more than it gives, for example.