“Jenny, tell me a story.”

“Why are you asking me? You’re the writer.”

“Well, you’re the Jenny Everywhere. You know what you’ve actually been through.”

“You always leave out all the interesting parts.”

“That’s because it’d be too long. Once you start talking you never shut up.”

“So why ask me if you don’t want to hear what I’m saying?”

“OK, pretend I’m an evil king who marries a woman every day and puts her to death.”

“If you were, I’d overthrow you and take over the kingdom.”

“OK, pretend you think there’s some good in me and you want to turn me away from my evil misogynistic serial-murdering ways by telling stories.”

“Sure. Once upon a time, there was a writer who was always staring at the computer screen and reading Tumblr instead of actually getting things done.”

“Ouch. Point taken. Just let me finish looking through my dash.”

“That can wait. You’ve been on the internet for hours and didn’t get any sleep last night. Put down the computer and look me in the eye.”

“All right, fine, you win.”