my god
i forgot you existed
i had pushed you away from my world
i was done and the pain stopped its flowing
and i was ready to lie down for the night

but then you had to come trudging back in
with your death and your dying and such
and god when did i stop looking
for the things that i never knew i lost

maybe it all does lead
back to a single thing
but god the cuts were never so deep

why did you come
back into my life
i had forgotten how much i missed you
it’s a shame, really
truly
and honestly so
cause i ’m so sick and tired of missing

of missing all and
every thing
and every one, at that
and
fuck me
i can’t
even bear to stand
for this shit
that i’ve piled
on top
of myself

why did you have to just get up and leave
why
i am asking you
why
why did you leave me
oh why did you go
why did you just get up and die?!

this just isn’t fair!
i was doing so well!
i was off of the drugs and the pain
but just as you were
bereft of my heart
you, slamming the door,
came back again