“cotton did not have magical powers” LOL! That made me laugh!

Just for completeness, I’m commenting on my own story.

The child is 4 years old. This isn’t a true story. I will not prevent any of my kids wearing a dress or skirt if they want to. I mean, if they were girls, nobody would bat an eyelid if they went out in public in trousers.

I get the point of the story, though the dialog was hard to follow. Was the second line also the other woman, and if so how is how the narrator dresses his kid affecting her kid? Like I said, the overall point and tone still come across, and it’s an intriguing scenario.

I’m clearly out of practise writing for the Ficly format. I wrote the introduction to this piece and realised I had only 300 characters left. THX, my wife shares your criticisms: I am clearly giving the reader too much work to do and making some unreasonable assumptions.

(and I’ve added an “I ask” that will, hopefully, clear up the dialogue a little)

Upon second read through I picked up on what the other mom was getting at by indirect association (probably adding “my son Adam into a poof”, while not as neat, would clear things up). A good look at a timely topic. The other mom’s use of the word “poof” is particularly demonstrative of her insecurity: she can only treat the issue with a euphemistic detachment.

I love the line about cotton’s magical abilities! Like THX, I had difficulty with the dialog. I was pretty sure that “she” was Adam’s mom, but with the thing about “turning my son into a poof” I was confused too. I thought surely she could only mean Simon. Are the two adults married? Anyways, I think there’s an easy fix: in her response, instead of “making him wear that” you can say something like “making your son wear that” or “making Simon wear that”.
The second thing that was a bit difficult was how the mom seems to have no idea what might possibly be wrong. I totally get that wearing a skirt isn’t bad, but still I’d expect the mom to be aware of social norms and so know that she’s violating them. So I understand her reaction to Adam’s mom, but perhaps you could write her with a little bit more clue. Anyways, that’s just my take, feel free to ignore it! Overall, a very good story with a positive message. Five pencils for you!

I’m right up against the character limit, so there’s not much I can do. I’ve changed “making him” to “making Simon”. Thanks for the suggestion.

Yes, “she” is Adam’s mum.

The narrator (a dad in my mind, but you correctly conclude that the gender is not specified in this piece) is quite aware that social norms have been violated, but really sees no point in bowing to what is only a convention. The narrator’s quiet refusal to take ownership of Adam’s mum’s issues is forcing her to deal with them herself. There’s nothing more inflammatory to a bigot than having to deal with their bigotry on their own (they love to share).

I sympathise with you over the character limit. It’s really hard coming back to ficly after a while. You completely forget how concise you have to be. As for the dialogue issue, I’d suggest making the poof line part of the previous line. So make it come straight after Adam’s mother’s first line. I don’t know if that would fit with your intended flow of things but it’s how I read it.

The cotton line made me smile as well. I agree that kid’s should have choices when it comes to their appearance but, as a ‘victim’ of a child’s ‘life choice’ I think they need a lot of guidance.

I do hate to stir up trouble, but I wouldn’t let a boy wear a skirt. I’d let him play with a barbie, or wear pink, but I’d draw the line at a skirt. What if it were a princess dress? Really people?

Overall it’s a good message though. And I think Adam’s mother is horrid.

Thanks for entering! Don’t forget to comment on all the others =)

Ironically, it wasn’t all that long ago that boys and girls alike wore dresses/skirts up to a certain age. Try something like that now, and a scenario much like the one above is very likely to play itself out.

Abby, thanks for your comments.

Just one question, though, what if it were a princess dress? I challenge you to come up with a good reason he shouldn’t that doesn’t rely on appeals to convention or warnings about possible bullying. Trust me, I’ve tried and failed.

Jim: indeed. In addition, on the blue/pink theme: what colour is the bodice of Snow White’s dress? Is it this colour because of the gender associations we have now or the associations we had in 1937? If they are supposedly hard-wired, why have they changed so radically?

It’s all good fun.

Children develop. There’s my answer.

And if my brother here, today, (he’s 20) remembered that his mother allowed him to wear a skirt/princess dress as a child, their relationship would disintegrate and his confidence would be damaged.

It isn’t the child, as a child, that I worry for. it’s their future. Sometimes guidance in choice is necessary.

I do understand your side of the debate, and I’m not wholeheartedly against it. I was forced to wear extremely girly stuff when I was younger and I’ve always held it against my parents. But children rarely see something beyond face value -

to us, the skirt represents a lot: freedom of choice, lack of stereotypes, sexual acceptance
BUT
to a child it’s just something pretty, and maybe the fabric feels good.

He isn’t actually making the conscious choice to wear a skirt. It’s just clothes to him.

And there I rest my case.
(sorry =) lol)

I didn’t have any trouble following the story but maybe all the creases have been ironed out of it. I understood the message and support it. While I wouldn’t force my (nonexistant) kids into specific clothing, I can’t see myself caring what they wear. If I had to explain it to another parent who obviously had their own problems, I would shrug and say, “He thinks it’s a kilt. Try and go along with me on that please.”

I like how you combined the skirt with a Transformers t-shirt. Kids just have the best fashion sense, don’t they. :)

I really like the overall message and theme of this, plus your writing is just enough serious and then tidbits of comedic dialogue to make a very complimentary style. Congrats on the feature!

This reminds me of this story on buzzfeed. http://www.buzzfeed.com/rsultan/this-dads-superhero-cape-is-a-skirt
Isn’t it sad how people get so uppity about their societal norms? The kid’s still growing and developing- people in the past used to dress up their small children in frilly little outfits all the time and they all didn’t “end up gay”. I’m sure some were gay, but who cares? Who cares if the kid grows up gay or straight- his clothing has nothing to do with that!

UGH!

I would sucker punch her in the face…

Little boys should be able to wear skirts sometimes. IT’S FUN! THEY SWOOSH AROUND AND STUFF!

Ehe… sorry. I got a tad carried away there.

Still, this is great!

As the New York Times asked a week or so ago… what’s so bad about a boy who wants to wear a dress?

It’s no longer scary and wrong for girls and women to be happily dressed in trousers. Why people still baulk at boys and men in skirts and dresses, I simply don’t understand.

And as for the idea that someone else’s choices could ‘make’ anyone gay… sigh

This tale is a neat encapsulation of all manner of prejudice and how it affects those least able to understand it.

My heart actually goes out to Adam. Poor kid. It’s such a sad thing when parents get bent out of shape…even with disagreements present, two parents should be able to voice concerns without making the playground the scene of a melodrama.

I got confused about ‘his skirt’ until I read on and it clicked. I like how this addresses certain issues actually…shame some people are just that narrow minded about some things… like ‘cotton did not have magical powers’, ingenious line.

Something tells me Adam doesn’t care a bit. … shows how much more accepting children can be compared to adults. Kids have to be taught how to discriminate, they aren’t born thinking that way.

Your father character is an absolute hero.
Its sad, though. Whatever issues someone has, whatever their prejudices, they can’t take it out on a kid.
I really like how this story gives a glimpse into someone else’s life and an experience Ive never had.

Reading it after the revisions I find that it flows fairly well.

The angry adult’s actions lack discretion – If a problem arises (as some would say, perception is reality…. or thereabouts) it should be reasonably dealt with. I get the sense of raised voices – which might just be me – but that bugs me. I extremely dislike uncontrolled emotion paired with loud volumes. Especially aimed at children.

Just realised that I have absentmindedly skipped over this story in my commenting. I’d agree that the ending was a bit squashed, but it was still a very well written story. I will hold off on making further comment until I see your evidence that cotton does not in fact have magic powers.