The Queen walked to a pen filled with wild turkeys. She loaded a dart gun with one shot, aimed, and speared the Tom of her choice. The turkey fell over, paralyzed with tranq.

“Your turn.” She handed him the gun and a 3 of Spades held out a small case of red tipped darts. He loaded one, nervously, under the hawk-like stare of the Queen. He aimed, but the turkeys began squawking and flapping and trying to escape. His first shot went wide. The cards, chips, and Queen laughed. He reloaded, and the second narrowly missed. The crowd hushed. The third stuck.

He was handed the fowl and followed the Queen’s lead as she lined up a golf ball on the first hole and swung her limp turkey’s head at the ball with enough force to rattle its brain. The ball bounced off the obstacle, wall, and careened towards the hole, losing momentum, dropping slowly in. The crowd clapped and cheered as she bowed.

He lined up his shot, swung, and the ball sailed out of the first hole, never touching the green.
“This is stupid!” he screamed