This was a bit unclear, like a giant run-on sentence. It’s not a giant run-on sentence, but without sharp details and spaces between paragraphs, it was more difficult to read. “And so they did carve out” could be “they carved out” “no statue made not on” is a double negative; a very unhappy sentence. How about “every statue not carved on the summer solstice has dried up its tears..” “would stop to” could be replaced with more active verbs, “ceased to, stopped, failed to” for example. then you mention the yearly trek, which is heretofore unexplained, and confusing, unless it was part of that first ficly that didn’t publish correctly. And after mentioning the plant growth lacking, then you go back to saying the path must be cleared, which is not the right place to put that. Either move it closer to the calcium chloride sentence, or explain again about the snow and lack of hot tears at the end. as far as your plot and story goes, it is a little slow going, but I like the look into a native culture.
ElshaHawk (LoA)