“…And it was in this area that a couple out on a midnight hike through the woods stumbled across the body of what may have been a man in his 40’s, a victim of an apparent animal attack. If you’re of a nervous disposition you may want to turn away… The picture is on screen now. As you can see, a lot of the flesh is missing with only small traces left— The only reason we can speculate that this was a man is due to this pile of clothes found stuffed under some tree roots, mere meters away from the body. Police are urging anyone who can help to identify this…”

The television grew quieter as I began to leave the bar. The sun was blazing down outside, a welcome sight. There were a few motorbikes outside. I made a mental note that something like that might come in handy soon. I finished off my lemonade as I checked my pocket-watch; it had been twenty minutes. She’d better hurry up if she wants to leave without a scene. There she was, walking out with a grin and the jacket of a man she took into the bathroom.