An Unfinished List
This boy was the first of many
 This boy was much older than me
 I wanted to play grown-up, house, doctor
 My palms were sweating bullets
 This boy I don’t remember too well
 I think it happened ages ago
 when his hair was still long
 This boy was a friend of another
 We had everything we could ask for
 and we threw it away
 I still call him up when I’m not myself
 wondering where it went wrong
 This boy was a mystery
 Staying in State Parks after dusk
 and kissing on top of parking garages
 This boy was one I had sought after
 But what I thought was something else
 wasn’t anything at all
 This boy was a stranger
 He invited me out for coffee
 We ended up at some party
 but I got bored with him
 and got his friend’s number
 This boy was at the same party
 I wanted to see if I could still attract men
 We ended up a mess in his bed
 all sighs and breath
 He was an experiment.
 This boy quietly came out of nowhere
 He has a gentle and patient heart
 a slow and steady smile that spreads
 across his face when I come home
 This is the last boy