Great repetition within the paragraphs! Very well described, with enough info to be genuinely interesting but little enough to warrant a sequel or prequel. What a ficlet should be.

whoa, there’s a lot left to the imagination here.. not really sure the exact location.. this could do well with a sequel or prequel.

I agree with Elsha. I’m not sure I understood what’s going on.

I couldn’t manage a sequel so I wussed out and did a prequel instead, hehe. Intriguing story though.

I like this. It’s detailed but still remaind nice and vague. Let’s the reader fill in the big blanks.

Love the detailed vague-ness. Very intriguing. Great job!