Good stuff. I can’t help but feel like the stray thought amidst her concentration is out of place. Or maybe you intend for her to suffer a burning… It’s unclear.
I get it. She opened herself up to the truth, that she is the master and it is her belief that she will succeed and therefore, she will. It does interrupt the flow having the thought jump in, but it is explained later.
mark_i_wang
ElshaHawk (LoA)