I enjoyed the story, but it reads as a little rushed. There was some confusing imagery (first she’s close to his ear, then she’s a million miles away), and there were some typos. I like the direction of the story, and I think you should give it another pass. I’d like to learn more about these three characters.

First off, I love the title! You know, once I started reading this I thought it might be a sequel to nomad’s Frivolous Kisses. Sadly, it wasn’t. Lastly, I don’t understand the line: ‘The last thing I need is for you for a pilot.’ Huh? :)

Arrrg, stupid typos. I’m not sure if it’s much better now, but thanks for the feedback.

Of course she is physically here, but in a delusional state of mind making her a million miles away, or at least he feels a million miles from her, thus the chasm between them. No love there any more. Maybe there wasn’t any love ever. Maybe the allure of her body has not got the hold on him it once had. You’ve captured the character well, but no time to explain the relationship.

I’m glad I read this after I published mine or I might not have written one at all. Good read. Love the punch line — it doesn’t feel forced at all even though you probably had that line in your head before the story was over. That’s a sign of good writing right there.