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Orbituary

He was on his death bed. Nobody knew he was dying because he had nobody to care about this. He wasn’t dying from anything special, really. Basically malnourishment, and that coupled with his advanced age didn’t make for a good combination.

A year ago, he was as healthy as a horse. He exercised everyday by walking around the block after the usual round of geriatric calisthenics and a vigorous game of bowling with his retro wii console. He spent the afternoon having tea or coffee with friends. He went to bed early after brushing his teeth. Note this, people. No dentures.

Then Orb came out. It promised trips down memory lane. Its insanely low prices prompted nearly 75% of the population to purchase it. It resembled a crystal ball and claimed to slide you down your history, from now to womb.

Now he spent nearly every waking moment clutching the orb and peering into its depths. Because he was as healthy as a horse, he’d outlived nearly half the Orb users. He made inarticulate sounds as his mind fragmented.

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