I met my girlfriend at a singles night.

Which sounds like a fairly boring relationship origins story but there’s an important fact missing here. At this point I’d been with my girlfriend for several years.

“What on earth are you doing here!”

I don’t remember which of us opened with this gem, but lets face it, whoever made the accusation was on a very shaky moral high ground.

“But, you’re here too.”

Ah, the response was a well administered rock to the opening line’s scissors. Sadly failing to do anything to improve the conversation. I don’t recall what else was said but even if a stenographer were present I still couldn’t tell you as they likely would have refused to commit anything that was said to paper,

I broke up with my girlfriend at a singles night.