I like very much how this ficly starts out

It starts out cold and robotic. Which fits, but it ends “warm”.

One of my first things I learned on Ficly: Warm and cold:

“I’ll” is warm, “I will” is cold.

“We are” is cold, “We’re” is warm.

This:
>Soon, I’ll find out whether we’re alike in death too. Wish me luck. (Warm)

Is different from this:
>Soon, I will find out whether we are alike in death too. Wish me luck. (Cold)

I feel ending this Ficly the way you started, cold, mechanical, icy, emotionless, is the best way to end it.

Initially, it was a conscious decision to have a change of tone. However, your point is valid in that within the character constraints it does feel “better” to stick to one tone.

Perhaps if I had more characters – that eternal question never answered on Ficly :P

(Edited for tone)

Evil 1024, big teeth grinder for me too.

If you meant the story to warm at the end, it would have been best to leave it. I just took the time to share what I’ve learned on ficly.

I challenge myself a lot. Once I wrote a story using both warm and cold; a conversation between a man that still loved a woman, yet the woman didn’t love him anymore. So yes, using both warm and cold can heighten feelings.

Your protagonist obviously was warming up to his own thoughts/emotions/plans. I see it now. I think you should reconsider and change it back. You’re writing for you.

(Shit, I feel like I hijacked your story. Sorry)

Interesting read. Feels like a take on technology, or AI, even. Maybe I’m off. I felt like it could be take on an interesting dynamic and a new spin on things we’ve seen before (take “The Matrix” movies for example), but there’s infinite possibility, since future is somewhat speculation. At any rate, it’s a beginning that drew me in.

The idea of looking at a sentient AI “dieing” along with humans is intriguing. I liked the style, I imagined hearing it all from a synthetic voice in a dim-lit hallway of a drifting spaceship.

Open the pod bay doors, HAL.