This is a fun opening. I can imagine Vincent Price reading the first 2 paragraphs. I shall read on.

“However…” Fun way to end the scenario. Death seems to have a sense of humor at the very least.

Zen, what a fun read. I read the first two parts almost as a prologue. You can start and end those sections with a _ that would italicize and separate those from the last part that seems to be the beginning of the story. If I’m off base it doesn’t matter, I like this ficly very much.

I agree with 32 that it might work to italicise those first 2 para.