This is interesting. I think it’s going to be about the girl, and it turns on me.

I like how much of the owner’s personality comes out, even in the first thing he says.

I, especially, enjoy the dark overtone in the last line. I look forward to see where this may go.

I like how clear the character’s roles are and how time is taken to introduce the scene and set the tone while leaving enough space to move the story forward in a believable manner.

The date that was introduced was so specific that I googled it to see what had happened on that day but didn’t find anything of significance which made me feel like I was missing something.

Thanks for the comments folks. Remembrancer – the date isn’t significant, I just made it up. I suppose that it might be distracting though; I’ll think about rewriting and omitting it.

Nothing short of epic. I really like the overall tone and feel of the piece. The focus on the girl then the interaction of the two men is intriguing.

Cool, cool beans.

Rewritten, excising the specific date, in response to Remembrancer’s comment.

Written about a time when kings didn’t divorce or annul, it was the guillotine that ended their marriage.