This is the saddest poem I think I have ever read-

I agree with Cariad. Heartbreaking.

Perhaps, sadness… I don’t see it that way. I see strength. It is hard to leave a silent solitude, and you have found the beauty in it.

I’d say one thing. All the lines are perfect in ten beats bar one:
“No strike toward which to turn the other cheek”
I’d suggest rewording although (at 1am) I have no idea how. Perhaps I’ll think it over.

Still, I relate to this a lot. There is no heaviness here, to me. It reminds me (slightly) of Frost’s “Desert Places”. I’m sure you’ve read it, but if not, you should. Your syntax reminds me of his.

The flaw you detect is minute, but well spotted, inky blue. However, you must also take accent into account. I pronounce “toward” as one syllable, as though saying the word “sword.”
It may not be accurate to the english language, but it flows perfectly according to how I speak.

Thank you for seeing the good in this piece.

I see the advantages of a life of solitude as noted, but where is the beauty in a heart of stone and godless life? maybe I am taking it too literally. it is 1am after all, but this seems not a life of solitude but a life of loneliness. ;(

I’m sorry for misunderstanding Jae :( Maybe if you hyphenate it, British idiots like me won’t get so confused :P Just a suggestion. You know how much I love this.

The beauty is in the silence. People sit silent on poles in the East. There are hermits wandering across Africa, nomads through the Middle East. There have always been the few ready to bear the burden of solitude in pursuit of greater meaning, or in retreat from pain and suffering. At one point or another, we all feel alone in this way.

Sorry to intrude on your poem Jae!

No intrusion at all. These are the kinds of discussions that we used to have, digging deeper into the meanings and constructs of what we write. I love it.

Excellent point Inky- I see what you mean- in this, I can relate now ;) it is a beautiful piece of writing none the less.

I certainly can appreciate the beauty of silence and solitude; however, a heart of stone and a godless life are not beautiful, but heartbreakingly sad.

Sad and lonely but also a bit defiant in the end. Feels like it’s about surviving and the cost of one way of doing so.

I saw it as a godless life being a life devoid of power; a heart of stone, a wall to keep from harm.. But I live with a philosopher and might have picked up some of his tendencies.