Sorry, it’s been awhile. You know, work and such. Well, here’s the next “installment.” :) What do you think?

This heightens the tension dramatically. I found myself holding my breath part way through. I like how you showed Nate’s confusion about the fun so quickly turning to tragedy. There’s one typo I noticed in the third line; “stun” should be “stung”, correct?

@Miz Em – Thanks for telling me! I fixed it, and thank you for your feedback!