“So how did this happen?” asked the doctor.

“Well, I was camping in South Dakota and I think I got some bug bite.”

“And you said it’s right beneath your naval?” the doctor asked, scribbling something behind the clipboard.

“Yeah, here” said the patient. He pulled down his shorts and showed the infected insect bite. It was protruding a whole inch. A bubble of pure puss. Tender to the touch. “It hurts when I touch it, and when I bend over,” the patient said.

“Hmm,” said the doctor, getting a closer look.

He grabbed a scalpel.

“What, what are you going to do?” asked the patient.

“Oh, cut it open with a scalpel, push the puss out.”

“Haha,” said the patient, thinking the doctor was joking.

The doctor lunged forward and cut a deep slit into the puss-bubble.

“Now I just gotta push out the puss,” the doctor said eagerly, intently surveying and pushing at the gashed protrusion. “Oh yeah, there it is,” he said, his eyes nearly crossed and his glasses askew on his nose, savoring the creamy puss.