The first time that I hugged you I could tell that something was different. It was as if you were afraid to be touched by anyone, but you still embraced me and I will always thank you for that. As the days and night of you being home added up, I could see that you had changed. The other wives, always said that you would come back different, that you would need time, and that I would have to learn to deal with that. But I never believed them, you always sounded the same when you called and your letters seemed as if you spoke the words themselves. But as the darkness moves across the land, I now understand better what the other wives meant. I see you stare out into the yard, as if looking for something; something that you know in your heart, will never come. I see it in your eyes when I walk up to you, you know what I am thinking and asking. You turn away not wanting to hurt me with the look that you give, but I have seen it and know it all too well.