I used http://outerhoard.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/earthward3.png to find the pentagram shape in the constellation.

The story feels pretty clunky to me in general, but I think I got my general point across. Let’s hope so anyway. ^^;

I think it fits the challenge well and I love it. There isn’t too much detail or not enough. Good stuff!

I like the idea of greater and lesser arms and the meaning behind each gesture. Well done.

And it fits the challenge much better than my story did. Congrats

I am really interested in this world. I hope you expound on it some day.

I’m intrigued by Hop’syth and her kind. Their form as well as their mind and how they came to use craft that was already ancient by human ages. Fascinating race.

Someone judging a competition must be careful about giving feedback before the deadline, but I think I can if I give it to everyone at the same time. The entries that stuck more or less to the challenge description are yours and http://ficly.com/stories/4588, so I’m posting a comment on both. You may revise your story in the time remaining.

Your story works, overall. I have no major criticisms, nor is there anything I particularly want to praise. The attention given to the aliens’ body language is good.

As for minor criticisms, I think it would be better to refer to the Earth more obliquely, because I doubt it would still be called “Earth”. You could call it the human homeworld or something.

In the images, I don’t see a pentagram. The nearest I can see is a pentagon of faint stars near the left hand side, but a constellation of faint stars seems unlikely when there are bright ones nearby. Also, to me a geometric figure is a less interesting shape for a constellation than something tangible.

wow you have alot of talent jessica when you get to be a famous writer can you hire me as a choffeur
i have never done it but i wrote a story about a serial killing driver so its almost like i have.
you know like i am not a killer driver but i stayed at a holiday in express. good work though

I’ll decide on a winner tomorrow. In the meantime, please help me to make up my mind by posting a comment on the challenge page.

“. . . but a constellation of faint stars seems unlikely when there are bright ones nearby.”

For me, Microscopium and Antila come to mind.

YAY!