Waking Up Weird

Bree rolled over t0 slam the alarm clock. You have used your snooze button allotment for today, the mechanical voice intoned. It is time for you to wake up. Beep! Beep BEEP The alarm sounded like an angry truck backing up.

She realized she was naked. Not unusual, but not expected. Sitting up, she turned off the alarm properly. Regaining consciousness, she felt uncomfortable. Too tired to stand and see what she was sitting on, she reached under her leg and grabbed it. “Ouch!” She saw she had grabbed a penis.

Her penis.

Though she had never had one before, she knew that it was definitely her penis. She was certain she had gone to bed without one, and wondered how she had gained it during the night.

“Thank God you turned off that alarm!”

“Who’s there?” She used the sheet to cover her body, especially the newest part.

“Dave!” A handsome face poked through the doorway. “From the bar. Remember?”


“We had such a wild night!” He stood in the doorway and she could see . . . he had a vagina.

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