I’ve used any number of internal computer systems before, all with silly acronym names. Names like SABS, or SMS, or SAP, and so on. This system had a similar name: LCARS, although Kat says that the person who designed it had long ago left the company, and no one else could remember what the name meant.

While I wasn’t surprised to hear that, I was surprised to discover that the system actually worked. It was simple, easy-to-use, and it did exactly what the rather detailed (but incredibly straightforward) manual said it would. It didn’t hang. It didn’t freeze. It didn’t – hgnh! – forget my settings.

An hour passed and I had enough of the basics down to be able to do my job. Another hour and I’d probably be able to do my job efficiently, as well as the jobs of three other employees.

I will be honest with you – by this point I was so surprised that I’d almost forgotten entirely about my suspicions. Of course the moment I let my guard down, the first cracks in the veneer began to make themselves apparent…