Well, that was unexpected. Very dramatic turn there. The middle part where all the action happened wound up a bit muddled and run together. Short, choppy sentences can be as effective (or more really) at conveying a hectic, dramatic situation than run-ons.

Oh no! She was right: a night to remember! The middle was a little confusing, but I can’t wait to see where it goes and what she does about Shane!

Very climactic event, some good imagery.