yeah that was freaky.. but I’d take the ticket..

good story i like the pace of this one

Exciting stuff, even if it’s a little hard to follow having just jumped in at this point. The last three lines felt a little rushed/awkward. I think it’s mainly the punctuation/grammar of the third to last sentence.

you could be right there.. removed a coma.

ya.. there’s a lot that’s happened at this point.. you kinda have to start at the beginning.