There are more lines to read on her freaking forehead! From behind a shimmering gauze veil, Madame Tremendo looked pityingly across at the latest visitor to the ‘Tent of Wonders’.

Most clients are sad saps coming for reassurance that everything’s gonna turn out OK, the thirty-something’s with three kids and a lifetime of bad choices keeping them awake at night. But it seemed this one was different. At least she has some personality… Cute face, too.

‘Darling, Amanda? What do you come to me for? A girl like you – good job, nice family, new haircut?’

Oh the beauty of the convincer. When you can pickpocket a business card, recognise a good accent and smell salon-brand shampoo from ten paces, you’re in business!

‘Well, I’m looking for love’.

Here we go…

‘I thought as much… Dark haired and hazel-eyed, dear – you must grab it, and don’t let go!’

That same day, Amanda bumped into Tom returning to the office – dark haired, hazel-eyed, and with a gauze veil shoved hastily into his back pocket.