Why… am I sad? …am I mad? …am I lonely? … do I feel the way I do? … do I really feel that way? …do I wonder what other people think of me? …am I irritable? …am I loud? … do I feel like I can only rely on one person? … do I joke when there’s nothing to joke about? …do I laugh at violence? …am I the person I am? …do I feel like I wasn’t meant to be this person? …did I think I had friends in people I honestly didn’t? … do I continue to live what I feel like is a lie? …do I even lie? …does this make no sense? … does this make sense to me? …don’t I understand half the things I am supposed to comprehend? …am I so confused? … do I cry for no reason? … have mood swings of five seconds? …do I know I’m not bipolar, yet the thought occurs? …do I think something’s wrong with me?

But I know I’m wrong. I am wrong about everything I just said. But why do I know I’m lying to myself, even as I write these words? What is wrong with me? Why does no one understand this or me…?