Diary of a King: Modern Day (As Dictated to the Secretary)
Man, I love maself some kingin’
Man, I don’t even know how I become king o’ this land (belch) but I sure do know I like it.
Alls I know if more boose, more ladies, and I’m happy as heell HEEEYYYAAAAAAAHHH
Today, I found fourteen pieces o’ lint in my bellybutton. At least, I think it was Fourteen., it was the one where ya hold up all yur fingers assept fur one of em.
Man, today my wife was like, “Billy, get to cleaning! These twelve chillren ain’t goinna clean emselfes!”
I was just like SHUT UP BITCH THIS IS MY HOUSE, MY RULES! NOW GO IN GIT ME A GOTDAYUM HAWT PAWCKIT!!
Damn, girls these days…….
(incredibly loud, long belch)
They just doughno how to act.
But it shir is great bein king.