From the traveling circus man, previously referred to as the gypsy, Walter learned the springs were called “Hope Springs” by British settlers in the early 17th century. According to legend, these springs cured all ailments. However, one day the springs ran dry. The settlers who relied on the springs for vitality quickly died. It wasn’t until a bearded traveler named Christian Jesus Gabriel literally stumbled across the dried-up spring one night after partying a little too hardy that their powers were restored. Rumour has it, that Christian Jesus Gabriel fellow fell and spilled his 40 all over the dried springs and it was at the instant the springs were revitalized and flowed again. Christian, being in the springs that night as they refilled during a full moon, was granted eternal life by Odin’s Raven.

“So all I have to do is use this spring one night, during a full moon, and I’ll live on eternally like Mr. Gabriel did?”

“No, not that simple. You must make the journey hammered. Drunk. Coconut liqueur.”