My mobile started ringing so I could avoid the question, I don’t normally answer withheld numbers but I was glad for the distraction. I recognised the voice of my father-in-law. “Hi Jim, how’s it going.”

“Not well Tom, I’ll cut straight to the chase, we’ve had several zombie sightings in your area and you’re the most senior person nearby, you’re being recalled.”

“Well, actually I’ve got undead outside the front door right now, but are you sure this is serious enough for a recall, it’s a local police issue surely?”

“You’ve got them there! I want to enact the zombie protocol immediately.”

“The basement’s flooded, my gun’s in the shed and we haven’t got a months supply of food, no one takes the zombie protocol seriously anymore, it’s been 12 years since any proper sightings and 13 years since the last death.”

“You should know better than anyone how dangerous zombies are. I want you to get your gun, I want those zombies dead and I want the family safe at the MOD base in one hour.” With that he hung up.