“This is a Sig-Sauer P226. It will be your standard-issue sidearm. I won’t tell you you’ll eat, sleep, and make love with it, but you will want to keep it close to hand…”
“This is a TASER. You’ll carry it when you can’t carry lethal weapons…”
“This is a Steyr AUG assault rifle…”
“This is an M-25 Individual Airburst Weapon System—or ‘grenade launcher’ to you…”
“This is an M-70 variable aperture phase-pulse plasma rifle…”
Some time later, James was worn out, and his shoulder was sore from the butt of the assault rifles kicking it. He still needed plenty of range time, but at least now he wouldn’t shoot himself in the foot.
Rather than go sleep just yet, James found his way to the training track…where he was treated to an unusual sight. A robot wearing a giant smokey-the-bear hat was kneeling on the bed of an F150 pickup as the pickup weaved its way through an obstacle course.
“YOU CALL THAT A TURN, MAGGOT?” the robot DI bellowed. “MY GRANDMA COULD CORNER BETTER THAN THAT, AND SHE WAS A CHURCH BUS!”