Kind of disjointed almost but the imagery is interesting Feels like you’re trying to say too much with too few characters :)

S.J.

Haha, it’s funny cause I gave almost that same critique to LuckyBeaux for the preceding piece. Then I did a sequel in the same style and did the same thing. Thanks for the feedback, S.J.

i like the fairy tale riddles and characters, and the ending is great. I can picture this one a little better than its inspiring piece, but there are still gaps like a fuzzy memory or dream.

Magical word choices. Well done for not feeling the need to sequel and make everything clear… Keeping it in the style can’t have been easy, but you really pulled it off, well done :)

Elegant, almost euphoric pace and choice of words. I loved it.

I really enjoyed this piece. The words are very colorful and imaginative. It may be a little disjointed, but the mind ate it up like candy :)

I could sequel but I won’t because when I sequel I love to change styles, rhythms and direction. Somehow I don’t think folks like that LOL

I found this piece evocative and absolutely beautiful. I disagree with your self criticism totally, I think you have really well developed imagery and a specific snippet of narrative that read really well to me….now I will read the prequel:) This reminds me of Neil Gaiman, has some of the feel of Stardust or Neverwhere that new fairytale thing that i love so well.

Iagree with Chaka. Definately the Neil Gaiman,‘Stardust’ style. An interesting energy flowing through….morbid yet lightness.mmmmm

This was a superb entry, and although I can’t give it the official nod, as it wasn’t the primary point of the challenge, is undoubtedly the winner of the ‘Best Sequel’ aspect of the challenge, congratulations THX :)