I thought Goldilocks was just fast…

I just assumed the story had been watered down. Then again, these are semi-civilized bears with furniture and the means to make porridge. Perhaps this is why one shouldn’t really think about fairy tales too deeply.

another one of these stories that has a dubious moral. If you steal make sure you can run fast? It’s OK to steal from animals?

and you cheated with the “aren’t” ;-)