The Five Steps (Part II)
My whole body is like a cave. Empty and full of nothing. This new lonely hurts so bad it feels like someone is squeezing my body in their hand until I ooze out between their fingers and become a puddle on the floor. And then they step on me. I feel like a pin ball between cement bricks. That’s how I am without you. Only someone so great could cause so much pain when they’ve passed. I could only wish to be like you. But I will not let go. I cannot let go. But my love for you is deeper than those pains. And though your eternal sleep will now always be my eternal ach, I will always be daddy’s little girl. She’s just been forced to grow up. But she will always love you. 24/7. 365. 366 (on leap years).
(Because sometimes, knowing what you had while you had it, hurts more than the ignorince of not knowing until its gone. If only because youll actually know what you will never get back instead of only dreaming about what could have been.)